More car things

Just when I thought I was getting better at being an adult...

A phone call with my Dad. Re: car things.

LJ: Dad! I just put air in my tires.  

Daddy: Okaaaay... 

LJ: Yes. Those weird lights came on again on my dashboard. You know, the scary exclamation one? 

Daddy: Yeah...I remember 

LJ: The ones that came on last time when it got cold? I thought they would go away when it got warmer. But they didn't. So I went to put air in my tires. And I used that lil gauge thing you gave me.  

Daddy: And did you make all the tires the same? 

LJ: Yes! At like 32 or something.  

Daddy: And did the lights go off? 

LJ: No! They didn't. But I shouldn't worry, right? I mean, it's not a big deal?

Dad reassures me that it's not a big deal and hopefully the air will help. Then magically right before I hang up the phone, the lights go off.

Success!

And then I promptly set off my own panic alarm as I get out of the car.

Sigh. Just for a second, I thought I was getting good at car things. But only for a second.

Deleted Scenes {Part 9}

Thursday, July 27th
Dropping my car off at the Honda dealership on my way to the airport

LJ: Just an oil change please! (handing over my keys and secretly a lil proud of myself for remembering to do this without Dad asking me about it) 

Steve at Honda: Oh, looks like your inspection expired. Last month. 

LJ: (after a looooong pause, staring at the sticker on my window) Welp. Seems it did. 

Steve: So you haven't been pulled over for that yet, huh? 

LJ: (still staring at the window, wondering how on earth I didn't notice this) I mean, Steve. You don't even want to hear about the car things I was dealing with in June. Hail storm 2012 broke me.... 

Steve: So you want us to take care of that for you today?  

LJ: (STILL staring at the 06 * 12 sticker on the window) Ummm...yes please. Can you? 

Steve: No problem, Ms. Johnson. We'll get it all fixed up for you by the end of the day.

Ohgoodgrief. Really? Reaaaallly?
So much for becoming a functioning adult.
I'm no good at this game.

{on owning things}

Perhaps you might have heard of a lil hail storm that hit dallas in mid-June? No? If not, let me tell you a not-so-short story about how that lil hail storm broke my car. And me.

Here were the facts -

• 6:30pm and still at work
• No covered parking (by choice...)
• Summer storm, another one. Not just rain this time. Hail. Lots and lots of hail. Crap.
• Conflicted: Run through giant spiky ice balls falling from the sky to try and find covered parking? Or just stay put and hope for the best?
• I stayed put.

30 minutes later, I was walking through the parking lot, surveying damaged trees, cars, wind shields. Yikes. And upon approaching my lil silver Honda, this is what I saw...

Not JUST a broken sunroof, it was shattered and only a few moments before most of it came falling down. So that. Plus, I am a genius and had left the sunroof shade open inside. Which meant shattered glass and wet leather. Neat.

It really was the perfect storm of sorts - 

• Should have left work at 6ish, I wasn't doing anything terribly important for 6:30pm. Would have beat the storm home. Where no cars were damaged.
• I had opted out of garage parking because a) I am always late, the garage adds time, the lot is quick. And b) I am terrible at parking in small spaces. 
• Sunroof shade open. Glass, water, wet leather. Awesome.
• It was 7pm, no one to call at the insurance or the Honda service department.
• I am new to owning things. And completely overwhelmed by the whole situation.

Can you blame me though? I had no idea what to do when your car is broken by falling ice! No idea who to call, what the next steps are, or how to fix it.

Please allow me to preface this story...I am normally a completely rational, completely calm, solution-oriented gal. My natural first thoughts were...

This is fine. I can handle this. I'll just get enough of this glass out of my seat to drive home. It's all going to be fine. 

My first call was to Mom, who clearly was in no position to help her on-the-verge-of-breakdown daughter. This wasn't a big deal. The glass was safety glass, it wouldn't cut me. Just drive home and call the insurance company. Easy enough. Except the glass did cut. And who the hell knows what to say to the insurance company? Who is closed at 7:30pm? I think that's when I maybe-not-so- politely hung up on her.

Next call was to roommate Lindsey. Who I knew was in yoga class and wasn't surprised when she didn't answer. Next call to Jessyca, who I was supposed to be meeting for dinner. Don't expect me.

Fail. Upon realizing that I needed help (not only to get home, but also to figure out what to do next), that's when I lost it. And cried. Lots for the next few hours.

Next call was to Kristen, who lives just about 5 minutes away...

Kristen: Hey! I was just wondering about you and if you survived the hail storm. It was really bad by your office! 

LJ (clearly a mess): Umm, are you busy right now? 

Kristen: No... 

LJ: Do you think you can come get me at work? 

Kristen: I...yes...I can...are you ok?  

LJ: No... 

Kristen: On my way! 

LJ (upon realizing that might have been a bit dramatic): Wait! Can you bring a towel? And maybe some tape? 

Kristen: Towel? Tape? (clearly confused, but of course still peppy) Sure, yes! Be right there!

Side note: A sign of a true friend right there. No questions asked. Just on her way.

Kristen and her roommate Becky talked me out of a mild panic attack. Helped clean up the water and enough glass out of the drivers seat to get me home. Slowly and carefully. The rest of the night was spent trying to figure out who I needed to talk to, what I needed to do, how I was going to get to work for my 8am client presentation the next morning, and trying to hold it all together.

At 11pm I finally got off the phone with the insurance company. I can't remember any of the decisions I made in that conversation and I certainly didn't know if those were the right decisions. All I remember is that this wasn't going to be an easy fix. And it was going to take a week to even get someone to look at my car, much less fix the sunroof so that I could drive it. Was that right? Surely no, surely there was something they weren't telling me? A quicker solution?

Sigh. Overwhelming sigh.

Reminder, I am not typically an over-emotional kinda girl. I'm more of the "this is fine, it will all be fine!" mentality. However. This is my car. That I own. (or sorta own?) It has been mine for less than a year. I try to take really good care of it. I'm new to this after all! And now after semi-uncontrollable events, it was broken. And there were all these steps that I needed to take to fix it, but NO ONE COULD TELL ME WHAT THOSE STEPS WERE.

Aren't these big kid life things supposed to be easier to deal with when you live near your parents? Apparently not the case.

My ohsocaring mother had a few gems of wisdom to share...most that I will not repeat here because it seemed as if the more she talked, the worse I felt about things. But among those gems, this was one she ended on...

Well, just think! This will all make a really good blog post! 

Too soon, Mom.
Much. Too. Soon.

Rachel picked me up very early to take me to work the next morning. Thankfully.

"Good morning, Princess." she says.
"Good morning, chauffeur." I answer, in considerably better spirits than the night before.

My insurance agent, Larry, kindly called me back in response to the distress message I left on his voicemail the night before. Apparently Dad spoke to him and asked that he call his hyper-sensitive daughter and talk her down from the edge. Dad to the rescue.

"Lauren, this is all going to be fine. Let me give you a number to call. These guys will come to you and fix your sunroof. And we'll cover the cost automatically. Then do this and this and this...."

Thanks, Larry. That's really all I needed to hear. What to do, who to call and to know that my insurance will pay for it. Geeez. Where were you last night when I was having a massive breakdown?!

After driving to Plano for a rental car. (or making Mom drive me to Plano...) Apparently rental cars were on high demand in Dallas. Number 85 on the waiting list wasn't going to cut it. I ended up getting my sunroof replaced the next week - with a careful drive down I-75 and a few hours with other victims of the storm. And a pop-up claims office took 2 hours to tell me that there was another $3000 in exterior damage. Also neat.


Hey. Remember when I wanted to move to Texas? And have a big kid life? And own things? I take it all back. All of it. This NEVER would have happened in New York!

Finally, this week my lil Honda is in the shop getting all the dents removed. It took a month before any of the body shops had time to get to me. So one more week with a rental car and then I will hopefully have my pretty car back to me as good as new.

And all evidence of my broken car and broken ability to function as a real adult will be completely erased. I won't lie, I'm looking forward to it.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And in these tough times, special thanks to...

Kristen for coming to the rescue. Offering solutions, calming me down and driving me around.
Rachel for letting me cry and driving me to work. 
Ditto the above for roommate Lindsey.
Les for answering my midnight angry-cry phone call.
Dad for realizing there was something he could do to help. And calling to check on me.
Mom for...calling me out on overreacting? For being supportive? No? Ok. Fine. Then for listening to me cry and for driving me around. And contributing to this entirely-too-long bloggy post. :)

Some notes:
Mom and I have since resolved our differences in opinion on how to appropriately respond to uncontrollable life stressiness.
I have also changed my opinion on parking at work...and now race the clock to get there on time with the added pressure of parking in the garage.

Maybe I'll be a real adult one day after all.

Slacker

I have been SUCH the bloggy slacker lately. Oops.

I really didn't mean to. I have lots of half-written posts...in my head...I think.

So in effort to get back to bloggy business.

And because I looked to my iPhone photos for inspiration.

Here are ten super important (read: random) thoughts of the day.


1. Date nights with my niece are my favorite. They are filled with quotable moments that I am sure I had ambitions of blogging at some point -

"We're going to do this crafty project, ok?"

Showing me how she can write her name - "Only in pink La La. Because it's my favorite. And it's yours too." 

"Let's have a tea party! With JUST the girls. They'll love it."
"This piece of cake is yours. It has sparkles too!"

"Oh La La, you are just magnificent!" Followed by an attacking hug.

After falling down and getting slightly upset - "Oh no Sloan...but can you still twirl? That's the real test if you're ok" - She immediately twirls away.

2. NY Mag is back in my life! Although, without all that time on the train, I find myself very behind in reading.

3. It's Girl Scout Cookie season! And these are my favorites...

4. I went to my first Mavs game a few weeks ago. I know, I know, what kind of Dallas girl am I? But now I'm hooked. So I'll be accepting invites / tickets whenever available. 

5. New Mizunos! In very bright yellow. But they were totally necessary after our muddy February 5K fiasco. Right??

6. My nephew Tyler is at such a fun age! He's starting to get a lil personality. He loves his big sister and watches everything she does. And just look at that hat! What a doll.

7. I would very much like a cuddley puppy. Mom says I shouldn't have one in an apartment. (and maybe because I don't spend a ton of time at home...) Whatever. She's not the boss of me.

Just LOOK at these lil schnoodles! I need one!

8. Guess who had a layover in Big D a few weeks ago?!? World Traveler Extraordinaire, Angie Away. We talked for 3 hours non-stop in the Hyatt restaurant at DFW. I miss her. Like, a lot.

Now submitting applications for social media guru's / travel-a-holics in the Dallas area. I know she'll love it here. :)

9. Me and sparkly nail polish are having a moment. Next time, lighter base color. Probably pink. The options are endless. 

10. I made guacamole a la Pioneer Woman a few weeks ago. For a girly night with my friend Kristen. It was really really yummy. And easy. And we ate most of it in one night. No shame.

So here's a funny story...

Last Friday before Christmas, I had a morning pedicure date with Mom.

It was a perfectly normal Friday morning - except I didn't have to work. I had lunch plans with former NYC roomie, Julia. Then an afternoon date with another favorite New Yorker, Bethany.

So there I was. Festive gold polish selected for my toes. Chit chatting with Mom. Flipping through People magazine. Simultaneously tweeting, checking emails, texting. You know, all normal, daily multi-tasking things.

And then something happened. Something you never think will happen. Because you are not really that accident prone...

...I mean, maybe you fall sometimes while just walking normally. And maybe you get stuck in your puffy coat with a broken zipper every once in awhile. And maaaaybe you lost / had your iPhone stolen from a bar about a year ago...

But those things aside, not reeeaaally that accident prone. Right?!

And that's when it all happened. In slow motion.

People magazine slipped out of my hand. Floating down into the pedicure water.
Instinctively, I reached down to save the $4 magazine.
Simultaneously, beloved and slightly more pricey, iPhone 4 slips from my lap, falling down down down, directly to the bottom of the pedicure tub.
I might have screamed a curse word.
My pedicurist definitely squealed.
My sweet mother was shocked to silence.
The owner rushed over in lightening speed to grab the phone before anyone else could think about reacting. He grabbed a towel, removed the cover, and offered up a fan to help dry it out.
ohmygosh. no.

The rest of the pedicure is a blur -- Wait, I'll have to buy a new phone. I can't NOT have one. Great. It's Christmas, how ever will I find a new iPhone in a store, they're probably all gone! Oh I am definitely not up for an upgrade yet. My iPhone 4 is only 1 year old! I'll have to pay full price! Ahhhhh! How will I surviiiive?! -- Not dramatic at all.

I somewhat remember thanking the nice staff, paying and shuffling out with pretty gold toes. After googling "what to do when you drop your iPhone 4 in water", watching videos of people dismantling their phones, deciding if I took my phone apart there was no way I'd ever ever get it back together again, I ended up jotting down Julia and B's phone numbers just in case. Turning my drowned phone off. And stuffing it into a bag of rice for as long as I could stand it. Sigh.

After 24 hours of being disconnected, I decided it was time to turn my phone back on and assess the damage.

It's on!
Ok. That's a good sign.
Now. Emails? Check. Tweet tweets? Check. Google maps? Yep. Safari? Good. Words with Friends?? Oh whew, maybe I'll be ok?
Mom calls. It rings! I answer.
OhmygoshIcan'thearanythingthroughthespeaker. No really. The speakers don't work? Seriously?

So. I have a phone. It survived. I can text. I can email. I can do everything I need to do. Except...and I mean, this is a small but...I can't really so much talk on my phone. Awesome.

Hope no one was really hoping to hear my voice any time soon. I'm outta business.

Awesome. x2.
Rarrrr.


**UPDATE!**
In recent developments, the speaker is magically working again. For the time being at least. I am currently able to have a conversation on my phone (brilliant!).

I am not however, able to play music, or HeyTell messages (sorry friends!) or use headphones. Perhaps in a few days, those speakers will come back to life too! No? Wishful thinking? That I could submerge my iPhone in pedicure water and come out with zero casualties?

Fine. But I'm not happy about it.

an update

oh heeeey. apologies for my unintentional bloggy hiatus this past month!

apparently this often happens this time of year...see last december. however, once you throw in a sister's epic wedding week + holidays + other new texas life things, appears things get even busier!

lindsey so kindly requested that i get back to bloggy business and write something soon - plus she needs things to read. she even offered her own suggestions for an editorial calendar. staring with a lil thing like my sister's wedding. ohhh? that little thing?

so while we're waiting on that update, here's a post i half-wrote a few weeks ago and then got distracted. by something terribly important i'm sure. like christmas music on spotify. or kendra scott earring sales.

here's to the end of this month-long dry spell. stay tuned for more soon. promise.


scene: 
gloria's on greenville
catch-up happy hour with some of my fave new yorkers
andrea & brian
who were in dallas for thanksgiving

after a good hour of non-stop chatter...

brian:  "i think that your accent is coming back..."

lj: "is it?!?!?" 

brian: "it is."

andrea: "well it must, being around all these texans all the time!"

lj: "it's true...it's no longer cute when i say "y'all" at work"

i suspected this would happen.

Today's Tale: So Graceful

So about walking. Apparently after a few weeks in Texas, I'm a bit out of practice.

Walking back from a morning iced coffee run to Whole Foods with Lindsey yesterday morning, the following took place - as if in slow motion...

Mid-conversation with Linds.
One last step to go on a seemingly normal, but really quite tricky, set of concrete stairs.
Complete misstep down the last step.
Immediately hit my knees. Hands following.
No coffee was lost in this tragedy. No sunglasses broken. No wallet dropped.
I'm a pro-faller.

Lindsey: OH! LAUREN!!!
LJ: (from the ground) ummm....shit.
Lindsey: ARE YOU OK?! WHAT HAPPENED?!?
LJ: Ohmygosh. I'm fine. Just...maybe...a little bit bloody.
Lindsey: Oh it's fine! You can't even tell!

Lies, Linds. Lies. But I love you for trying to make it better.

Upon further investigation, it appeared that my knees were in pretty bad shape. Yes, knees. As in, both of them.

This incident was followed by a few hours of meetings and one particularly uncomfortable agency-wide gathering where I stood for 30 minutes, leaning against the closest wall, with stinging knees thinking..."I'm bleeding at this stairwell meeting with everyone in the damn agency standing here..."

Finally, my gashed up knees stopped bleeding. Then I texted mom...

"Today's casualties."


She was not amused. My phone rang immediately for an explanation. Oops.

Later, while sitting next to a co-worker.

He pointed at my knees "Ummm....?"
My response, "Oh yeahhhh, it's terribly embarrassing. I fell walking back from Whole Foods."
Him, "Today?!?"
"Yes, this morning. It hurts."

And then a gchat convo with Les...

LJ: I was going to hit the gym...but miiiight have fallen on the stairs today and messed up my knees pretty bad. So wanna see Horrible Bosses instead?
Les: WHAT? Ohmigosh Lauren...
LJ: Yeaaaaah. I'm so graceful.
Les: You fell down the stairs today and I got a speeding ticket. good day all in all I'd say
LJ: Oh good. We're quite the pair.

I am so cool.
27 years old with gashed up knees...because I fell down the stairs.
They'll be torn up this way for at least another month.
Awesome.